Comments for sursumcorda.salemsattic.com/post/unoffendable

Comment #4122

2025-01-16T16:34:12Z

To each his own emotional reactions. I don't find it hard at all not to yell at bad drivers or red lights. And my reaction to hurt is much more often withdrawal than anger. Like anger, it can be either good or bad, but in any case it has to be dealt with differently.

Comment #4121

2022-09-12T22:11:52Z

I agree that he's largely focused on the micro issues, i. e. the personal grievances that we can (and tend to) respond to with force and fury, unfriending, doxxing, shaming, calling out, or otherwise "owning" (pwning? is that still a thing?) the offender. The foundational emotion may be hurt, but the reaction is anger. (I also suspect he uses "offense" a bit differently from how you might use it.)

I found his approach helpful, urging slowness, de-escalation, non-defensiveness. It's hard to put into practice, though. Just think how tough it is not to yell at bad drivers or red lights... and then how hard it can be not to react with similar harshness to those who've really wronged me. To me it resonates well with Jesus' teachings about turning the other cheek or giving to him who asks.

(We refrained from recommending the book because we knew you'd hate the writing style. :-) )

Comment #4120

2022-08-22T11:06:06Z

You are absolutely right, Grace. Sin is offensive, from the most egregious to what we (but not God) might consider unimportant. That's why I reacted so badly to the idea I'd had about the book before I read it. I still think the author gets a number of things wrong, and I still detest his writing style. But even though I have found his recommendations on the personal level to be more immediately applicable, he's right that meanness, bigotry, hatred, and maybe even war are not often turned around by more of the same. Absolutely there is a place for responding to evil actions with all the legitimate force we can muster, and I don't think he'd disagree with that. The evil nestled in human hearts, however, is more likely to respond to a different approach.

Hanson tells the story of a Christian coffee house in the middle of the arts district of a big city, which offended some people by being extravagantly friendly and loving towards their neighbors whose sins were obvious—reminiscent indeed of the Pharisees who were indignant when Jesus ate with the most feared and hated people of their day.

I'm convinced that the only way to mend the Great Divide that separates our country on so many issues is to get to know each other on a local and personal level, even those whose views we find appalling.

Comment #4119

2022-08-22T03:11:04Z

Thanks for making it clear why I should never read this book. My blood pressure couldn't take it.

War is an offense.

Hatred is an offense.

Bigotry is an offense.

Just being downright mean is an offense.

And so on and so on.

A person may be able to turn the other cheek for personal offenses, but what about offenses against others? It almost sounds as if this author is saying: If God allows it (whatever it is), it cannot be offensive. Doesn't work for me, no way, no how.