Comment #3442

2013-03-24T18:21:27Z

I agree. Let me explain what was going through my head when I read that, however.

There's a certain kind of question that is sometimes asked and/or answered without regard for ones ability to handle a complete and honest reply. For example, "What can I do to be a better wife to you?" sounds like a noble and possibly helpful question. But if you're hoping to hear, "Nothing! I think you're a wonderful wife!" and are not prepared to handle, "I'm glad you asked; I have a list here...." then you may not be doing your marriage any favors. Similarly, I think we need to think twice when people ask us for information that might hurt or disappoint them. "Are you prepared to listen to an honest answer, not responding with defensiveness or derision?" seems to me a wise response when we're not sure of how our answer will be received.

Comment #3441

2013-03-24T13:16:44Z

The first quote still scares me, though. How can we be sure we did understand? If you tell someone "you didn't understand me" and they say "yes I did, and you're wrong" it doesn't inspire confidence or deepen relationship. We should be very cautious employing this judgement!!

Comments for sursumcorda.salemsattic.com/post/when-to-speak-up-and-when-to-shut-up

Comment #3442

Comment #3441